Chapter 4

Written by: Ken Burns


“He’s a Nancy-boy that Robin. He just makes me mad even though he’s got a good body,” Francis squealed into her phone.

She then seductively adds”I just like boys with tattoos like you.”

David looks up and realizes he doesn’t need to talk into his cell phone.  Her thighs are wrapped tightly around the longest branch of the Kahikatea tree. She looks down, feeling on top of the world.

David loves girls who can climb, are dangerous, and have a passion for tattoos. 

In 1981 pop music heroes Blam Blam Blam released a song called, There Is No depression In New Zealand. Francis now hears it as; There are no bears in New Zealand. That’s because they are only in zoos or on the telly.  The one she strung up in a tree is one of Lizzie’s childhood memories. She wants to get back at Lizzie for getting it on with her brother Peter in a tent.   

Francis swings down. Kahikatea’s don’t have branches close to the ground so she jumps three metres, hits the ground with her feet together, rolls sideways and her head smacks into the tree trunk.  Blood spurts out from her left eye brow. 

David runs over, takes off his white tee shirt and wraps it around her head.  He has no sympathy but likes being close to her.

Her nostrils quiver.  Being close to a half dressed and caring man turns her senses into overload. 

Lizzie stumbles through the undergrowth and sees her bear. “I found what I love!” she yells, then falls over a half-naked David, and Francis. Lizzie’s hand brushes Francis bloodied cheek. She smells blood on her fingers then turns and screams at David. “Why did you hit her?”

The next move is a slap across the face from Lizzie. Not one to take a first reaction seriously, David calmly rubs his cheek.

Francis stands up and holds Lizzie’s flapping arms into her side. “He didn’t hit me Lizzie. He came to my rescue!”

Tear filled eyes look closely at David and his beautiful body. Lizzie can’t help herself. She moves closer,      breathes heavily and pushes her lips onto his warm mouth.

Francis pushes Lizzie away, making her position clear. ”He’s mine. Don’t even think about it. Just get with Peter if you want to entertain yourself!”

The undergrowth parts as Robin breaks through. David knows about having a possessive nature.  He rubs his cheek with a smile and sticks his index finger into Robin’s face. This is intimidating as David makes clear the intensity of his physical attraction for Francis. “Francis says you were never man enough for her,” he says.

Robin is carrying Peter’s guitar.  The top strings are broken. The strap is shredded. He is panting with clenched fists. Tears are rolling down his face. He turns over the guitar. Scratched into the hickory back with traces of blood are the words - HELP ME. 


Ken Burns (NZ)


Where is Peter? It doesn't sound like another silly prank.
Interesting take on the situation and Ken has given this story what looks like a violent twist. This chapter can't be faulted for lack of action and I love the quivering nostrils - a little over the top but this shows the author is working hard to show attention to detail when working on character traits. I liked it and congrats to Ken, a comparitively new writer, for being the first author to write chapters for two serials in two consecutive weeks.
It was fun being able to add another dimension to this serial. I am interested in moving this along and keep the readers engaged. Anything can happen in this format.
Bother reading
This. I had enough trouble editing the comment that was printed 4 times
That comment should not appear 4 times above so ignore the extra versions of the same thing
There's been a lot of quivering nostrils about recently. Is it something in the water down there in New Zealand?
I'll have to do some research and make something up about the quivering!
lol@ Don't bother reading this. As soon as I started reading it I was intrigued!!

Ok, so I was thrown all over the place with this story. Action a plenty, just too much for my little mind to keep up with. I had to keep trying to remember the characters and what their personalities were. Phew.
I think Peter and Robin got a little mixed up - Peter is the reader and Robin is the singer and guitar guy. Oh well. I'm just following the most recent chapters.